


Sex Then Coffee

by warschach



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Play, Anal Sex, Crossdressing, Eren wearing a mini skirt, Humor, Levi's an ass, M/M, Rimming, Smut, Underage Drinking, dirty pick up line, he also awkward with feelings too, thigh high boots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-03
Updated: 2014-09-03
Packaged: 2018-02-15 23:40:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2247699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/warschach/pseuds/warschach
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren has a plan to humiliate Levi and he needs Armin's help to do it. A.K.A, the day Eren Jaeger dressed up like a girl</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sex Then Coffee

**Author's Note:**

> So, this was an old project of mine that i kind of given up one then one day I had the inspiration to complete it. First this was supposed to be a short smut with Eren dressed as a girl (cause I have needs), Then I had some silly ideas and the fic kinda is funny and smutty. It got a lil fluff at the end too. I just wanted to make Levi shine and be a sexual predator in bed but a flustered school boy when it comes to feelings (he supposed to be awkward I heard). So enjoy this trash.

“Make me a woman, Armin!” Eren demanded, staring determinedly in the mirror, catching a wave of concern and fear pass over Armin in its reflection.

“Eren..,” he started with some hesitation, he wasn’t quite comfortable with Eren’s plan that he beseeched on to him 30 minutes ago. The blonde was probably thinking that Eren should let go of these hardened feelings of his, but Armin knew better than to talk his best friend out it. “You don’t think you’re taking this a little too far?”

“Me?!” Eren shouted indignantly at Armin’s reflection, gripping the edge of the stool to station himself less he punch his friend out of pure frustration. “I’m taking it too far?” There was a sharp edge to his voice and Armin rolled his eyes as he shoved his fingers through his hair, examining Eren’s face in the mirror. He bit his lip in contemplation how to proceed with Eren’s plan.

“I get it. Levi isn’t exactly a saint either, but maybe it best just to completely ignore him all together.”

Eren swirled in his seat to fixed Armin a sharp scowl. “Saint? Levi is the fucking devil! His fucking middle name is probably Damien!”

 Levi had a repertoire for many things like being an asshole and sleeping with half of the student body- though that was still a rumor not that it mattered to Eren. No. Levi was a serious torn in his side from the moment he stepped foot into Eren’s life, so that would be about two months of Levi’s insufferable bullshit. He was getting a migraine just from the thought of him. A breath of forced air left him, Zen, focus on being Zen as fuck.

“I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have a middle name,” Armin reasoned as he rolled his head and planted his sassiest expression at him.

Eren gritted his teeth, refraining from slapping his best friend for the second time this day. “You know..” He breathed deeply, “I didn’t mean literally. I just meant he is the fucking antichrist!”

“Okay, but he doesn’t really have a middle name.” He was pretty sure Armin was continuing this just to piss him off. There was a glint of amusement in the blonde’s baby blue eyes. Fucking prick.

“Do you want a black eye?” He threatened.

Armin huffed at Eren, pointedly crossing his arms and screwing his mouth. “Then have fun trying to sneak into the frat house as a girl cause I sure as hell won’t help you.”

“Fine. I’m sorry, can we just do this?”

“All right, but if Mikasa finds out- I had nothing to do with this, “he negotiated.            

“Deal.”

[x]

 

“Armin, this skirt is too fucking short,” Eren whispered harshly, tugging on the hem of the black mini skirt. Armin growled and swatted his hand away, pulling Eren behind a hedge of bushes to fix his outfit. He was quite the sight to behold, black skirt hugging the curves of his hips and ass, shaved golden legs in slick black thigh high leather boots, satin green blouse accentuating his exposed collar bone.

“Stop pulling on it. It supposed to be short.”

“I feel like my ass is going to fall out. How do girls wear this shit?” Skimming his hands over his back, Eren felt for the globe of his ass, hoping the fabric didn’t reveal the swell of skin. Thankfully it didn’t, clinging firmly an inch below his rear.

“This was your idea.”

“I know, I know.” Eren whined, adjusting the skirt once more.

Armin hissed and yanked his hands away. “And stop messing with everything. I put in all that time and effort into this and you’re ruining it.”

“Well excuse me for not being comfortable in women’s clothing!” Eren vented, wrestling with the bra that intended on snapping his ribcage inwards.

 Slapping a hand over his mouth, Armin glanced over his shoulder, seeing if anyone was in earshot of their conversation. “Do you wanna let everyone know you’re guy right now?” He told Eren once he realized that all the party-attendee were oblivious to their presences.

“No.” The brunet pouted once Armin removed his hand.

 He clicked his tongue at his friend, and gripped his chin, pulling it forward towards him. Reaching into his bag, he retrieved a slim column and twisted the top, unearthing the shiny lip gloss.  He looked back at Eren expectantly and he pursed my lip, allowing him to glide the fuzzy tip across his smear lips. Eren smacked his lips together, applying the pink lip gloss evenly through and gazed back at Armin for approval. He nodded after dabbing the corners of Eren’s mouth with a napkin.

“Don’t fuck up your lip gloss,” he warned sternly, slipping his cosmetic products back into his satchel.

“Then don’t touch my face next time,” Eren countered back, green eyes framed by black linear and false lashes.

“Eren, are we really going to get sassy right now when I can easily load up photos of you on Facebook?”

He gaped at him in shock. He wouldn’t dare, but the confident smirk he wore assured Eren he had no qualms about it.  “You’re my best friend,” he said.

“Well tonight you’re acting like a total diva.”

“Sorry I… “ Eren’s gaze fell on to the floor, fighting the temptation to card his hands through his hair. The shoulder length hazel wig atop of the teen’s head made that action impossible without incurring Armin’s anger once more. Honestly, Eren thought this scheme of his would be simple. Throw on a wig, some tight clothes and waltz into the frat house and seduce Levi, the antichrist. But now, standing in 2 inch thigh high boots with his face painted with what felt like ten pounds of makeup, Eren was seriously reconsidering the whole thing. Tucking back the long brown locks that obscured his view, Eren worked his mouth.

“I don’t know if this will work.”

The noise Armin released was one of exasperation and annoyance as he threw his arms in the air for good measure.  “No,” he declared. Eren’s face of confusion didn’t go unnoticed by him. “I did all that work for you and you are not pussing out now.”

His eyebrows knit together. “Weren’t you the one trying to convince not to go through with this?” Eren argued.

“That was earlier when I didn’t pour all my hard work into making you a hot girl. Now you’re all fixed up and you’re going in that party. And you’re going to seduce Levi and get those sex tapes!”

Shock couldn’t even begin to describe the expression Eren wore at Armin’s outburst. His mouth dropped as he attempted to understand what exactly broke Armin.

“Are you-“ He started gently before he was abruptly cut off,  the blonde stabbing him with a finger of a guy (dressed very femininely) who was pushed past his breaking point.

“This is happening. You’re Eren Jaeger. You never back out of your word. Ever.”

[x]

So there they were, walking up the block to Levi’s sorority house, the duo pressed their shoulders together as they walked side by side. It made it easier to duck out of the way of drunken streaking frat boys. It also made Eren feel less like a cross dresser when Armin was decked out equally in female attire. Though with his long hair and girlish like features he didn’t require as much work. He looked so natural, even with simmering silver shadow and glossy lips, in that halter styled white summer dress, maybe it was cause he wore flats instead of heels like Eren. Heels were hot, and Levi Ackerman didn’t fuck the Church-going Preacher’s daughter, no he fucked the sexified vixen who worked men over for a living. And he needed his undivided attention on him tonight if his plan was going to work at all.

Eren wobbled awkwardly on the side walk when a drunken idiot darted near him, his feet stumbled forward before Armin steady him. Armin wasn’t kidding when he warned Eren about wearing heels; it took numerous attempts for young adult to master the art of not snapping his ankle in half. Honestly, this was giving Eren a new found respect for women. He could never criticize another chick who slipped their shoes off halfway through a dance. These fuckers hurt.

“Are you okay?”

Eren twirled around, hair waving around him and bangs falling into his vision, and flipped the asshole that bumped him. “I’m wearing heels, shithead. I swear- MEN!”

 Armin hid a smile behind his hand, a giggle threating to bubble out. His eyes widened as Eren threw his arms outwards. “What’s so funny?”

“You seem to have no problem fitting the role.”

Eren waved an opened palm in an arch like motion, jutting one hip out. “Excuse me? Girlfriend. I ain’t the one with a purse.”

“You told me you didn’t want the purse. You insisted a clutch was ‘sexier’.”

“It’s blue. That would totally clash with my outfit,” Eren said.

He rolled his eyes that were twice as big with massacre and white eyeliner, it really was Maybelline. He wasn’t born with it. “This is Coach, Eren. Have some respect.” He “hmped” at his friend and jerked his head to the right. Really? And Armin called him the diva.

Eren sliced his hands through the air. “Okay, we’re getting off subject. You remember the plan?”

Armin sighed, slinging the purse strap on to his other shoulder. “Yea, yea. How are you gonna get the tapes with him in the room?”

Eren smirked maliciously; Armin swore horns would grow from his head if he wasn’t wearing that wig. He pulled the leather clutch from his pit, the miniature carrier opening with a soft click. “I have this,” in a zip lock bag was a single white pill.

Armin leaned forward, eyeing the curious pill. He snatched the bag from Eren who barked an furious “hey” at him.  The blonde held in over his head, the street lights allowing him to examine the pill more closely.

Wiping his arms back to his shoulder, he sent a gaping expression to Eren. “Is this a roofie?!”

“Well yeah.” The simplicity of Eren’s answer enraged the blonde.

“Where did you even get this?!” Eren opened his mouth to respond but the blonde wasn’t through, “No wait! Don’t tell me, I don’t wanna even know. You’re going to drug Levi?”

“I need him unconscious. Not like I’m actually gonna fuck him and wait for him to knock out,” Eren reasoned. He didn’t really understand Armin’s issue. The worse he do to an unconscious Levi was shaved his balls and draw a dick on his face…Man, he should do that too. It would sweeten the blow. As they say, revenge is a dish served…cold?

“This is unethical!”

No, it was revenge was a bitch. That didn’t sound right either.

“Eren! Are you even listening?”

He wasn’t, not that he was intentionally blocking Armin’s voice out, but his brain was working overtime to recall the saying. He’d tune in back to earth as soon as he remembered it.

“Oh my god, I am going to hit you. And I don’t hit _anyone._ ”

Eren snapped his fingers, the information coming to him, finally. _Revenge is a dish best served cold._

He managed to cup his balls before Armin’s fist could get acquainted with it. Eren looked appalled and offended, how could he and as man to another man –yeah, they were wearing women’s clothes with matching undergarments, that’s beside the point – you just didn’t punch your fellow man in his nuts. It’s unethical.

“You leave Channing Tatum out of this!” Eren growled, hands still protectively cupping his boys.

Armin squeaked inhumanly in disbelief, “You named your dick after the guy from Magic Mike?”

“You listen here, he’s a beautiful man, and I don’t care how gay that sounds.”

Blonde bangs bounced as the blonde shook his head at Eren. “I don’t even wanna discuss this.”

“Fine. Listen, I’ll get him to his room, slip him a nighttime pill, then get the tapes. He’ll be okay.”

Armin screwed his lips, uncertainly, eyes darted away in deliberation. “I don’t know.” There was some doubt in his tone.

Eren patted his arm in reassurance. “I’ll just fuck with his clothes and bed. Make it look like he got laid and get the tapes. In and out.”

 Armin handed the plastic bag back to Eren. “Okay…Just don’t screw up.”

“When have I ever screwed up? What the fuck is with that face?! Don’t make me give you a titty twister.”

[x]

The bass rippled through the floorboards, hundreds of young adults loitered around the house. A group of men huddled around a keg, a long transparent hose of booze gargling down on half naked frat boy’s throat. The men around him chanted loudly with fists pounding the air, red plastic cups in each of their hands. Entering through the main entrance, Eren cringed at the cat calls aimed at him, every sharp whistle and holler of “nice ass” made him want to vomit. Don’t get him started on the guys who openly watched him pass by with their girlfriends on their arms. A well rounded slap usually followed afterwards, a slurred “babe, I’m sorry” accompanied it.  Eren wanted to be noticed, not eye fucked by every man within a 2 feet radius.

The duo ducked into the kitchen, after a guy slapped Armin’s ass and Eren laid the fucker flat, Armin thought a little alcohol would help Eren’s nerves. Another keg was placed by the kitchen island, a tall olive skinned girl with freckles dotting her cheeks sat on the island, foot propped on the sliver canister.

She wore a wolfish smirk, winking at Armin. “Hey cupcake, you want a drink?”

Armin blushed furiously and he fidgeted with his purse. “Please.” He squeaked, face red as a tomato.

“Can I get a name to go with that face?” The freckled girl filled the cup and handed it to Armin who was still too embarrassed to look the girl in the eye. “I’m Ymir.”

“Amy.”

“Hey could I get one too?” Eren asked, feeling like the odd man out.

“Damn you got a sweet voice,” Ymir purred and trailed her eyes down Armin’s form, legs crossing and body closing in himself self-consciously.

Armin sipped his drink, trying to fan his burning cheeks. “T-thank you…”

“You here alone, cupcake?”

Now Eren was piss, again, for another reason. Not that he was jealous that Armin was now receiving attention. He wanted a drink and he needed his wingman.

Eren butted between the two and Armin quickly escaped Ymir’s lecherous gaze. She shoved the drink at him, nearly staining his shirt, before he searched for Armin. Eren maneuvered to the other side of the side where the music thrummed loudly. It was a large space, emptied for the purpose of encasing a dance floor and its own DJ booth in the corner of the room. Strobe lights flashed, a disco ball hanging from the ceiling, it painted a pattern of moving light on the partyers.  In the room next to it, was a circle of sofas surrounding a large hookah, a group of guys and girls passed the pipe, all taking a hit before coughing and going into a fit of laughter.  A heavy fog settled on the stoners.

Among the group of potheads was a familiar face and his grey stormy eyes landed on Eren. He froze, eyes darting desperately around the room; none of the blonde heads were his blonde friend.

He needed to run. He couldn’t do this. Levi would figure it out in an instant but before Eren could end the mission prematurely Levi was slinking his way over to him. And Eren further doubted his abilities to seduce him. Levi was an attractive man but tonight he was pure sex. He strode with purpose and confidence, gloriously toned arms on full display with a form fitting black tank top with black cargo pants that hugged in all the right places. Eren never felt so self-conscious till those smoldering sliver eyes raked him.

Maybe, the drink was spiked with something stronger or it was the pot polluted air he was inhaling, but Eren shivered at the way his black fringe fell in front of his eye, a pink tongue poked out to lick his lips.

He was so fucked. And not in the good way.

All chances of escape dwindled when the raven reached him, a slender eyebrow quirked and a dangerously crooked grin purring a sultry “hello”.

“H-hi..” Eren peeped, his eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights.

He braced a thick forearm against the doorway, hard muscles rippling under the smooth skin “I’m Levi…and you are?”

_And I’m so fucking yours_.

_No bad thought. Bad thought._

“I like to know the name of the girl who gonna have my cum on her face.” He didn’t just say that, did he? Eren looked to him for confirmation that he didn’t just hallucinate the words. Levi winked, proudly. Oh, he did, he did just say that.

His mouth dropped out and a gasp fell out. Levi smirked, all cockiness and suave. That wasn’t a joke. He just seriously told Eren he was going to cum on his face. There wasn’t a flicker of doubt or a break of confidence as he waited for Eren to answer.

_He fucking believes he gonna fuck me tonight._

Well Eren wasn’t that type of girl or guy. Mouth properly closed, he crossed his arms and glanced at the dance room, feigning disinterest. “Like I suck your cock.”

“Would you rather I eat you out? I bet you taste like hazelnut.” It was becoming a skill not to loosen his jaw muscles whenever Levi spoke.

What the actual fuck. Girls actually fucked him when he threw lines like this? How?

Eren pressed his lips and glared. “No way any girl would fuck you.”

Levi threw his head back, laugh that sounded heavenly bellowed from his gut, and leaned closer. The raven dropped his arm and poised his body against the threshold.  Pools of mercury burned vivaciously.

“I have better ones. Would you like to hear them?”

Eren “hmp”ed him just like Armin did earlier and acted impatiently, playing with his phone that he stuffed in his clutch. “You can try but I doubt you even get a chance to suck my toe let alone my clit.”

“You got a nasty ass mouth,” Levi growled, invading Eren’s space, he jolted back when Levi’s breath brushed his lips.

He jerked back and the phone fumbled in his hands before he regained control of his movements. Eren didn’t need to touch his cheeks to know that he was blushing; Levi’s pleased crooked grin told him everything.

“I like to put my dick in dirty places,” the raven continued, shit-eating grin adorning his pale visage.  Eren resisted the temptation of imaging the aforementioned dick pounding his ass. God, let it be the pot that was making him have these unholy thoughts.

“Well I hope it falls off and shrivels up.” Eren barked indignantly, praying the pink across his cheeks could be deciphered as rage and not the obvious fact that Eren was thinking about Levi’s dick.

A deep chuckled came and Levi glanced at his crotch. “That would be a national disaster.”

“Your face is a national disaster.” Actually this plan was a disaster, he had come here with a clear rouse and now he was knee deep in a cess pool of dark temptations that were fogging up his mind. Where the fuck was the voice of wisdom and guidance that was Armin?

 “Are you hungry?”

Eren blinked at him blankly, “What?”

Levi suppressed a smirk that threatened to appear. “Cause omelette you suck this dick.”

Oh god, no.

“Wanna hear more?” Levi pressed when Eren released a dry laugh.

“Suuurre. Like that would increase your chances of getting in my pants.”

His face morphed into a more stoic expression, grey eyes reflecting a dark hunger. “Oh. I’m fucking you tonight. Count on it. I just wanna hear your laugh cause you’re gonna lose your voice later from screaming my name.”

This egotistical bastard. Eren had to press his arms to himself to prevent himself from knocking the guy out. “Oh my god, how haven’t you been pepper sprayed yet?” He seethed, allowing the disgust he felt to filter in his tone.

“Cause I’m fucking Levi. And you may not think it but I’m a gentleman. And you never gave me your name either now that I think about it.”

“And you’re never gonna get it.” Eren told him determinedly.

“That’s fine; I’ll guess your name till I get it right.”

Eren pivoted away from the egotistical fuckhead, let’s add narcissistic to the list cause Levi was determined to paint himself as Satan incarnated. “You must fucking think you walk on water.”

“Well I’m no Jesus but I can part your legs like the red sea.”

He made a sex joke with the bible. Levi really was the antichrist, the fucking devil that wore all black and dished out sex smiles to the general public. Would he hiss like a cat and jump on top on the dresser if Eren flashed the bible at him? Probably, Levi was Satan in a Sunday hat- a mother fucking sexy Sunday hat.

Why were half of his thoughts set on either fucking Levi or wanting to deck the guy in the eye? Eren felt sweat prickled down his chest and he pulled at the lapels of his shirt. He tipped his head back for another drink when he realized the cup was dry. When the fuck had he finished his drink?

“All out, baby?” Levi drawled. He allowed Eren no time to argue when he took his wrist and pulled him through the mob of people.

It was a tight fit so Eren pressed close to Levi’s back, one finger looped on the back of his pants. He ignored the way the hem of his shirt hitched and revealed a smooth plane of ivory skin. Eren swallowed thickly and averted his attention to the back of Levi’s head. He had a pretentious undercut that he fantasized shaving many times.

 That slowed his thumping heart.

Levi veered them into another part of the frat house, in had a bar with swiveling stools attached, a mirror sat on the wall with shelves of various liquor adorning it. Eren tried prying the fingers gripping his wrist but Levi’s was unhindered, the waves of marble should have hinted Eren of his strength.  Stupid buff anti-Christ with a GQ undercut.

They were seated at the bar when Levi finally let up. “Hey GQ fuck, I didn’t say you can touch me.”

Levi waved two fingers at the guy running the bar. “Two shots of Jack Daniels.”

“Listen I came here with my friend.”

The raven turned to Eren, manicured brows hitched playfully. “Yeah. Your friend currently has my friend’s tongue down their throat. So you’re with me tonight….Kristen.” His voice wavered slightly in uncertainty at the name.

Eren scrunched his face, twitching his nose. “Um. NO.”

“Sorry, those boots scream ‘fuck me over my daddy’s Ferrari’,” he flicked his wrist to Eren’s hooker shoes. He could really use those shots right about now so he can shove the whisky down Levi’s nose.

“One,” the brunet posed one finger,” My dad doesn’t even own a BMW let alone a Ferrari,” he introduced another one, “Two, why is every word out your mouth an insult?”

The bartender returned with two clear shot glasses and filled the cups to the brim. “Do you know the difference between a Ferrari and an erection?”

Eren groaned, titling his head back and opening his mouth widely. He was anything but the definition of lady like. How had Levi not figured out it was him? More importantly, why hasn’t he got a derection from Eren’s lack of feminine grace?

He relented. “What is it?”

Shot glass in hand, he paused it trip to his lips, smirking around the rim. “I don’t have a Ferrari.” The raven’s gruff voice never wavered.

Seriously? More dirty pick-up lines? “Stop.” Eren’s tone is severe.

“But it’s funny.”

“Am I laughing?”

“It’s fine, you’ll be moaning later-“

“LE-”

Levi pushed the second shot glass in his hands. “Shut up and drink, Natasha.”

Eren gritted his teeth and downed the shot of amber liquid, smacking the glass harshly on the counter top. The drink burned is only temporary before his body warms from inside out, a feeling of elation occupying the warmth. “Do I look Russian to you?”

“Mmm,” Levi eyed Eren, an intoxicated mist of pink dusting his cheekbones, “Give me a minute, I know a pick up for that one…Are you Russian, cause Ima gonna be Russian this D up your ass.”

Okay, that was pretty good .He pressed a fist to his mouth, shouldering shaking.

“Told you I have a lot of dem,” he waved for another two shots. Two right? Cause Eren swore Levi held up four fingers instead of two.

“How many shots are you gonna order?”

“Whatever it takes to open your legs.”

Eren kicked his shin, minding to dig the sharp point deeply into it. Levi yelped, twirling his seat from Eren as he nursed his limb. “Fuck. Now I’m really gonna make you beg for it.”

“HA! I rather be sodomized by a rake.”

Was he drunk or was he actually enjoying Levi’s company? No. The college student shook his head and patted the circles under his eyes. He had a mission: seduce Levi. No. It was seduce then drug Levi.

He totally had this and this could totally work. Then he took two more shots with the devil and Eren was having a difficult time recalling why he was there or the fact that he was dressed as a girl with Levi, the devil.

Rubbing his temples, he laughed to himself while his elbows leaned on the counter. “Ppffttt.”  There was a giddiness that bubbled in him.

“Was that a laugh?” Levi questioned next to him, eyes drawn to the brunet’s now covered mouth.

Eren swung his head lethargically to Levi, eyes not really focused on his face but on his crotch. He talked to it. “You’re not THAT funny…” What would be funny is if his dick talked to Eren. It wouldn’t but Eren was pretty buzz at the moment to hope against all hope that maybe it would. Maybe then he could understand why everyone wanted to fuck Levi.

“You keep looking at my dick like that, Jaeger; and you’ll be choking on it.”

The world’s blurry and opaque but Eren felt cold and it definitely wasn’t the draft that wafted under his skirt. His brain dissected the statement, repeatedly, one of these words were not like the other. One of these words just didn’t belong and that was Jaeger. His name. He was Eren Jaeger under the disguised of a girl whose name he had never considered to develop to avoid a sticky situation like this. And he just swore to Armin he wouldn’t fuck up.

Fabulous, he would get an ass kicking by Levi in his frat house in front of the entire student body, who would have Iphones and Androids to make the moment timeless on Facebook tomorrow morning, and he was wearing a fucking mini skirt with “fuck me over my daddy’s Ferrari” boots. This was the definition of torture. Levi was definitely the devil. And Eren most certainly didn’t find him attractive. Fuck those exposed collar bones that invited him downwards to his defined hairless pecks. Fuck Levi’s perky man tits.

His body clenched tightly, eyes shutting fiercely, waiting for the impending fist that was sure to meet his face. He would get one last hurrah before the ass handing was initiated.

Eren steeled himself, summoning all the rage in him to bite out his final words. “Fu-“

Then Levi’s tongue was in his mouth. His mouth. That sultry tongue danced in Eren’s mouth and the college student had every intention of biting the thing off with his bare teeth but devilishly muscle skimmed the roof of his mouth, Eren quivered.

He had drool staining his lips when Levi pulled away, lips beautifully swollen and red. “What-I…You-you kissed me!” His mouth fumbled over the word ungracefully, the sensation of Levi’s tongue still tingling pleasantly.

The hunger emerged once again in those pools of mercury and Eren swallowed thickly, touching his lips in disbelief and confusion. Eren’s mind had been diluted perfectly, reasoning and logic misting away like smoke on water till one need was left, aching. Levi leaned forward, a pleased smirk pressed to the discombobulated college student’s ear, “I told you I was gonna fucking you tonight, Eren.”

The statement nearly sobered Eren up, nearly, he was aware that currently he’s wearing women’s clothing and shoes that could snap his ankles if he wasn’t careful. He realized that Levi not only figured him out but acknowledged the intention of fucking Eren. That’s male Eren with a cock, not female Erin with a vagina. Then there’s the alarm that triggered with all the bits of information coming to Eren all at once. Any fraction of his plan working at all is completely soiled, if Levi did take him to his room the man wouldn’t be dumb enough to leave his sex tapes lingering about for Eren to take. Mind the fact that said sex tapes were another rumor about Levi that floated like STDs around the campus. Either the man was loose or he had a lot of enemies. Even if the rumored sex tapes were there, Eren was positive the fucking that would happen will leave him thoroughly drained combined with the 3 shots of whiskeys he had consumed. Eren would bring up the fact that the part of his brain responsible for making good choices is currently unavailable; so sex sounded fucking ecstatic. Sex with Levi specifically was akin to euphoric feeling of holding a piss too long then finally unleashing the floodgates of your bladder.

Fuck the plan. Fuck the fact Levi normally rubbed Eren like sandpaper on an open wound. He wanted to be fucked; right about the fuck now too, if humanly possible. Eren smashed his lip over Levi’s, an action that nearly propelled Levi off his seat. Levi growled a compliant, biting Eren’s lower lip in punishment.

The fabric of his panties was tight against his cock and he wanted nothing more than to climb the space between them and straddle Levi’s lap and grind against his length till they come. But the whiskey that warmed his blood made that action impossible to do without them both sustaining a hard fall to the floor.  Eren whimpered and reached a hand to the bulge, massaging the half hard cock.

Levi hissed through his teeth, hips bucking into the hand before he snatched Eren’s hands away. The soft whine that left the brunet’s voice made his cock twitch.

“Levi…please,” his sweet voice begged, lips seeking out the raven’s neck.

“Jesus, Eren, what happened to all that ‘you’re not gonna fuck me’ talk,” Levi groaned and fought off Eren’s wandering hands. He pouted when Levi swatted his hands once more.

Shame was a non-existed concept to Eren. “I wanna fuck, now.”

Levi made a soft noise in the back of his throat that as somewhere between a moan and a whine, he scrubbed his face, carding the black fringe that fell into his vision. “I thought you wanted me dick to fall off.”

“Yeah well now I want it in my mouth.”

“ _Eren_ ,” He took the brunet’s wrist and Eren stumbled after him, leaning on to his broad shoulders for support. He licked at the exposed shoulders and neck eliciting a shiver to spread through Levi as he fought his way to the second floor. He elbowed pass drunken, sluggish bodies, emitting an animalistic growl whenever any man pressed close to Eren.

“I’ve been waiting for months to fuck you and now I’m going to ruin you, Eren,” Levi’s hoarse voice brushed into his ear and the statement made Eren dizzy with lust. Levi had wanted him and he was just barely learning this information.

Eren finally found his voice once in Levi’s room where the raven shoved him on his bed unceremoniously. He fell with a huff, propping him body on his elbows while his legs lay opened precariously. “You wanted me? That’s why you’ve been fucking with me for months.”

Levi gave him his back as he locked the door. “Maybe my shitty pick up lines didn’t tip you off but I’m not exactly good at romancing people. Fucking, yeah. But feelings and shit, it’s like giving a girl head. It embarrassing and awkward and I usually get a tampon shoved up my ass.”

Wait, romance? All those times Levi prodded him and stalked Eren around campus was Levi’s method of courting. Eren gaped at his back till Levi faced him, a bottle of lube and a roll of foil packets in hand. “You like me? Like- like like?”

Levi glowered, cheeks growing scarlet. He crossed his arms and darted his gaze to the window behind his headboard. “Are you 5? Yes I like you. Now I really wanna fuck you then we can boyfriends or something.  My dick is so hard it’s going to explode like a nuke bomb.”

“What?”

The raven glared at him, eyes no longer radiating arousal but embarrassment. “Fuck, if I knew you were such a light weight, I would of given you beer. Listen you’re too fucked up so just leave. I won’t have you waking up tomorrow with no memory of this.” Levi deposited the lube and condoms on the computer table next the door.  He went over to Eren, pulling his arm to lift the college student off his bed but Eren let his body become lax, using his dead weight to keep him on the bed.

His head pounded with the confession. Levi liked him?

“Eren. Get the fuck up. I’m not dealing with your shit,” Levi grumbled, voice laced with annoyance.

The admission should have annoyed him and it did, but for another reason because it set off a bomb of hazy thoughts. He didn’t know how to feel about Levi’s feelings. He just wanted some relief from the throb between his legs and that was irrevocably Levi’s fault. He was the reason he conjured this idiotic plan and he was the reason Eren was hard and aching on his bed.

So it should be him to amend this situation. “I’m not going away till you fuck me.”

Levi coughed, sputtering over his words. “Did you not hear a single thing I’ve said, fuckface?”

“I did and you know what? I wanna beat you the shit outta you cause I’m horny and I’m confused. If you liked me, you should of just told me and we could have went out for coffee. But now we are gonna fuck first then –if I’m not hung over tomorrow- we can get some fucking lattes together like normal fucking people, you Hobbit fuck.”

His eyes narrowed, brows drawing together menacingly. “Did you fucking call me a Hobbit?”

Eren gulped at the asperity in his words. “Um…”

“ _Oh._ Now you’re fucked.” That was all the warning he got, Levi wretched his legs apart and Eren gasped out in surprise. He grabbed a hold of his thighs, jerking Eren towards the edge of the bed, and hiked up the black skirt till his hip bones revealing the lacy black panties that strained with Eren’s cock.

Levi kneeled between Eren’s thighs, mouthing the bulge, he tasted the saltiness of pre-cum through the fabric and Eren’s jerked in response. His mouth found the tip and lathered the sensitive head with his tongue.

“Panties? Eren, you little slut,” He breathed on the damp spot, smirking in delight when it jerked at the sensation. The body before him withered on the bed.

“Please suck it, Levi.”

Levi chuckled and groped Eren, kneading the base first then the head before repeating the pattern and dropping to roll his balls. His hips stuttered upwards, searching for more friction but Levi pulled his hand away. Eren whined indignantly at the loss. “I don’t think so. I told you I’d eat you out. I never said I blow you.”

Eren put his weight on his arms, staring down at the man. Levi gave him a devilishly wink before he hooked his fingers into the fabric, pulling it over the thigh high boots and throwing it carelessly behind him. His cock bobbed proudly and lay across his thigh, tip leaking and twitching. He held Eren’s gaze as entered two fingers in his mouth, suggestively soaking his digits with spit. Fingers thoroughly coated with saliva, he positioned himself near Eren’s hole, right hand spreading one of his ass cheeks. He buried his face deeper, kissing the soft mounds, delighting it the shudder that trembled beneath the flesh.  His tongue seek out the puckered hole that twitched invitingly, enticing the pink muscle to thrust inwards.

A sharp breath left the brunet and his hands griped wildly for leverage. It took all his strength not to buck into Levi’s face. It dipped in then out, slathering the entrance with spit before slipping back inside past the ring of muscles.

“L-Levi!”

Levi pulled back, slipping a finger into Eren. “F-fuck!” He shouted, lifting his head off the sheets to observe the digit disappearing into his hole, he thrashed his head back when that finger reached deeper into him. It massaged his walls, prodding curiously.

“More,” he bit out, back bowing off the bed as he rocked gently against Levi. “I want more, please.”

“Come on, baby, use that nasty mouth to tell me what you want properly.” Levi command hotly.  

Eren groaned and banged at the bed restlessly before using his arms to lift himself up. He had no quarrels telling Levi to fuck him earlier but now Eren felt the vulnerability of his situation, ass hanging off the edge of the bed, legs spread willingly with thigh high boots still on, swollen cock and asshole exposed to Levi’s molten eyes of silver. Now he wanted him to beg like a slut with all these variables.

That was something only the devil would do to you. Eren flushed, eyes falling downcast when they meet Levi’s. “I…” Emitting an impatient huff, Levi sucked at the junction between his thighs and hips. “FU-fuck!” Teeth grazed the sensitive area, causing a swell of redness to tint that skin. It nearly distracted Eren from the second finger spearing into his hole. The fingers worked eagerly in him, widening out into a “V” before pulling out and shoving back in sharply. They twisted in him, caressing the velvety hot walls. The raven’s head of hair bounced as he suckled at the hollow between Eren’s thighs and hips and the brunet’s cock twitched eagerly in his peripheral, begging him to take a taste. He moved to the other side to repeat the process, but not before he teasingly licked at the Eren, following a slick path of pre-come with his tongue. Eren’s breath hitched deliciously and he jerked, Levi’s firm hold on his thighs prevented him from shoving his member into his mouth.

“Oh no, my princess. You gotta beg for it,” he muttered against the heated light, tongue pressing light at the head. He prodded the slit and lapped at the translucent liquid the pour out of it.

Eren groaned into the sheets, stuffing his mouth with the fabric to muffle his moans. He reached between his legs and gripped his cock, getting a few forcefully tugs before Levi swatted his hands.

He whined at the heavy voice that scolded him. “No. You’re gonna cum with my cock in you and you’ll get it when you beg for me, princess.”

“Yo-you’re...the devil,” Eren spoke, relinquishing the comforter from his mouth.

Levi pulled out his fingers, spreading the cheeks to display the stretched hole gaping, he pressed his tongue to it again. Slicking up the opening once more, he drew back and spit into the hole, pumping one finger then two.

Eren had never been rimmed before, it was the type of act that happened in pornos, he never thought a tongue up his ass would ever be pleasurable but there he was arching, trying desperately to get that muscle deeper in him. That tongue was working wonders on him, he almost forgotten the lack of attention his cock was receiving.

“Fuck. Your hole is so hungry for me…look at it. Twitching. Opening up. So ready for my cock.” Levi moaned, roughly manhandling the golden ass, pinching the cheeks together then jerking them. “How long are you gonna make me wait, princess? I wanna be in you. Wanna fuck you with those boots now.” His voice was wrecked with hunger.

“Eren, tell me to fuck you. I need to know you want this cock in you.”

“Levi…” Eren whined, pressing his rear into those callous hands. They pulled at the skin and dipped to his entrance, slick with saliva, and thrust in. Levi curled his fingers, nails scarping along the walls for Eren’s prostate. When he found the bundle of nerves, Eren screamed and his body trembled from the aftershock of pleasure that pierced him like an arrow.

He was barely coherent when he used his forearms to push himself up; his heavy-lidded eyes bore on the raven whose cheeks with rosy with arousal. “Did you like that?”

“Yes…” His voice was almost unrecognizable to him. It was hoarse and frantic. “I want more, Levi…I want your huge cock in me, fucking me into the mattress. I want to feel you cum inside me. I wanna be your princess. Please fuck your princess.”

“You mean this cock…?” Levi sat back on his hunches, popping the buttons of his pants and revealing his member. The head looked bruised and swollen and languidly stroke his length as Eren watched, breath leaving him in short irregular intervals. Levi moaned, sucking his bottom lip as his eyes slithered closed, and rocked into his hand.

Eren drooled as Levi continued jerking himself, head thrown back in ecstasy. He groaned noisily and worked his hands faster over his cock. “You sure you want this….cause-ha…I can finish on my own.”

“Yes! Levi, please fuck me. I want you so badly. Please.”

Levi peeked from beneath his long lashes, a wolfish smirk twisting his features into a sexual predator. He got to his feet, turning to the table to grab the bottle of lube and a condom and threw the items beside Eren. Hooking his fingers under the hem of his shirt, Levi jerked the fabric off and settled between Eren’s legs once more. He heard the click of the bottle and the loud squelched that followed. Levi pressed two fingers, now coated with lube, and stretched Eren further, scissoring his fingers widely.

Eren whimpered, “I want your cock, not your fingers.”

“I know, I’m just wanna open you a little more cause I won’t be able to stop once I start,” Levi soothed, pressing soft kisses along the exposed thighs, they shivered under his lips. “I want us both to feel good.”

“I’ll feel even better when you’re in me.”

“You’re gonna be so full of me, you’re gonna wonder how you managed your whole life without me in it. So how should I fuck you? Like this?” Levi questioned, pushing the brunet’s hip wider. “Or maybe I should bend you over my table?” Eren moaned at the suggestion. “Maybe against the door so everyone downstairs can hear you getting the best fuck of your life. Letting them all know you’re mine.”

The raven chewed his lip, hummed thoughtfully as he glided a third finger in Eren. “So many possibilities.  I bet you’d look great on your hands and knees but I wouldn’t get to watch your face as you cum. What to do with my little slut…?”

Eren was breathless. “Please. I need your cock in me.”

“Fuck it,” Levi wretched his fingers free and reached for the packet, tearing the foil open with his bare teeth. He panted as he wrapped the condom over the head of his cock, resisting the urge to roll into the friction. Levi plopped and copiously amount of lube on his hand and coated his length. Confiscating Eren’s hips once more, Levi poised himself over the student, his hard length stabbing Levi’s hard abdomen. He used one arm to hold his weight and grabbed the base of his cock with the other. Claiming Eren’s lips, Levi rubbed his tip at the entrance, panting into the kiss when it twitched. Just one thrust and he would be in that tight heat. One thrust. Slowly, he slipped the head of his cock into Eren and the young man broke the kiss to moan into the air.

“Yes, Levi…”

His body shook with effort as he pulled out. Levi relived a shaky breath though his nose and pressed his cock once more, an inch more than before. He sighed softly, canting his hips shallowly into the heat. For Eren’s taste, Levi was going to slow, so he reached for the hard globes of Levi’s ass and propelled his cock into him, deeply.

“Eren! Fuck…so good,” Levi moaned, gliding his tongue into Eren’s panting mouth. He clawed the mounds roughly, preventing the raven from pulling out completely.

Levi bucked, slamming harshly into the tight hole. “Ah! Like that, Levi…like that.”

Their teeth clanked together sloppily, spitting staining their flush cheeks but they were too deep in the throes of pleasure to care. Levi hitched one of Eren’s leg onto his back, forcing the brunet to coil one boot around his waist, he held the leg in place by gripping Eren’s ass. The new angle allowed Levi’s cock to curve into Eren’s prostate and he arched, fingers digging half-moons into the pale flesh. His walls clenched deliciously around Levi and he rocked harder, searching to hit those nerves once more. He found it again, assaulting it as quickly as he could, hips losing their smooth rhythm.

“Harder! I want it harder…please. Ah- fuck me, fuck me like that.” Levi drew his hips back, the tips of his cock nearly slipping out of Eren, before he hammered his length into Eren’s spot. “YES!”

“Fuck…I’m not gonna…last…Eren,” The raven groaned again when the muscles around his cock squeezed him pleasantly.

“I’m close too…so close, so close. Levi. Don’t stop- ah. Come in me. I want your cum.” The bed rocked under them, head board smacking the wall behind it as the sound of music was smothered with moans of pleasure and the obscene noise of moist skin slapping each other. Eren’s deprived moans sent Levi over the edge and his hips jerked erratically as he rode out his orgasm.  He attacked the bundle of nerves desperately and Eren was coming in a matter of second after him. Warm ribbons of cum painted his stomach while he emptied himself.

“Eren. Fuck….Eren.” He hadn’t noticed he dropped his weight till Eren’s fists pounded his back weakly.

“Can’t breathe, Satan.”

[x]

The following morning felt like a scene straight from CSI, the world felt strange and out of place, for example his panties dangled from the ceiling fan. It hanged from the edge of the blades, precariously tempting to descend to the bed. The next oddity was the pain in his ass, it not the usual ache you experience from a unrestful slumber where you are certain a ghost kicked you ass in your blissful sleep. No it felt like something was shoved in him, repeatedly, and quite aggressively like a cavity search.  Then he noticed the condoms on the floor, _condoms_ , plural, like 4 condoms and another vacant bottle of K&Y jelly on the nightstand. But that wasn’t the biggest clue of the morning- no that came from the warm body next to him.

He spotted black hair. An undercut.

_No_

Then in the corner of the room were Levi’s pants and tank top with a sign overhead reading: Levi’s house of pleasure.

_Oh no, oh no. NOOOO_

Then last night events drummed annoyingly to the forefront of his mind and Eren came to a startlingly conclusion.

_I just fucked the devil. Oh fuck, I’m going to hell._

Clearly, he had only one solution for this situation: run away. Surreptitiously, Eren flatted himself to the mattress and slipping awkwardly on his back from the covers. His foot got caught in the covers and half of his body crashed to the floor and he cursed when his head banged the nightstand. The lamp rattled at Eren for his rudeness and the body on the bed shifted, Eren stiffened, freezing on the floor till the deep breathing came back.

He sighed, gratefully. Grabbing his panties and putting his wig back on (when had that happened), Eren snatched his boots and clutch from their spots on the floor and just as gracefully slipped out of the room. He prayed the bodies of the house were dead to the world; he didn’t want to experience first-hand the walk of shame frat boys initiated on the day after a party. Skipping on the balls of his feet, down the hall, he almost darted back into Levi’s room when a door opened. But the voice stopped Eren before he could make the mad dash.

“Eren!” It was a harsh whisper.

“Armin?!”

The blonde slapped a hand over his mouth and shushed Eren, blue eyes glanced back at the door then he released a breath. “Thank god.”

“What happened to you?!” Eren accused, “I need you to bail me out but you left me hanging.”

“What happened to me?” Armin asked incredulously, offended. “What happened to you?”

Eren blushed, cowering behind his boot. “Um…It’s a long story…you see”

“You fucked Levi, didn’t you?” Armin interrupted.

“Yeah kinda…”

“We can talk about this later. Right now I want to leave.” Armin order, dismissing the fumbling Eren, he guided his friend down the stairs, peeking over the railing to see if anyone was up. It was then that Eren noted another oddity, Armin had spent the night; clearly not alone, if the red hickies on his neck were any indication of that. The blonde’s clothes were also disheveled like they were thrown on in a rush to escape a situation, hair mussed messily. He didn’t want to comment on Armin’s odd gait or how he took the step one foot at a time, wincing when he landed to fast.

_Oh. Oh. OHHH!_

Well now curiosity had him, he speed up to walk alongside Armin, who gaze was determinedly on the sidewalk. “So…?”

The unasked question loitered in the air like thick cologne. Armin gave no response. “Really? You are not gonna tell me.”

“Damnit, Eren, I don’t have one night stands. This is your fault,” the blonde growled, letting go of Eren’s hand and violently smacking his arm.

“Ow, Armin. Calm down!”

He ceased his assault and huffed, crossing his arms and glaring at the passing cars. Beneath the tassels of blonde locks, there was a violent shade of red painting his cheeks. Eren waited as Armin worked up the courage.

“…Erwin Smith…” He mumbled faintly.

Eren leaned in closer, a hand to his ear, “What?”

“ERWIN SMITH!” Armin screamed into his ear.

“God fucking damnit! Can you not? Seriously.”

[x]

Eren was living a post-Levi life quite easily, ignoring his Facebook messages and texts were simple enough, dodging him on campus was another skill in itself. But Eren managed on well, so he had to take a twenty minute detour to get to his phycology class so he wouldn’t by chance bump into Levi as he left the science building. He could almost say that he didn’t think about the amazing fucking he got on that night. Almost. Eren only used it as flapping material like four times in the last week. It was 6 before, that was progress right there. Eren was progressing, moving on. Levi was trouble he didn’t want or need.

Nope, he didn’t need to be dating the devil while trying to complete his degree. A man like that would possess him.

He walked to the school’s café, his professor dismissed them early for the Thanksgiving weekend, and wrapped his green scarf and slipped on his gloves. His puff left his mouth in a visible puff of smoke as he grumbled a text to Armin, announcing he was staying after class to go over his paper for English 102. Pocketing his cell, he trekked over the patch of ice that threatened to catch the college student off guard.

_Not today, motherfucker._

Entering the shop, Eren breathed a pleased sigh at the heat that instantly thawed his frozen limbs. He bounced over to the growing line and took his wallet from his pocket, counting bills to pay for his and Armin’s coffee. Eren was whipping around to find a table with two steaming cups of lattes when a familiar face invaded his vision. Pools of mercury pinned him to the spot and it took all his strength not to drop the cups from his grip.

Levi strode toward him, gait as sensual and controlled like that night, he wore a black pea coat with a white scarf slung casually around his neck. The ends of his jeans were damp from the snow and his boots glistened as the slushes of grey snow slide off the surface.

“You look so different without your wig on, princess.”

Eren flushed, brushing past Levi to the table farthest from the man. He shouldn’t be too shocked that Levi followed after him and took the seat across from Eren. “Are you really gonna ignore me?”

“Yes.”

“Why? Cause we had a wild fuck one night.”

Eren banged a fist on the table, drawing everyone’s attention briefly, he glared at the white cup. “No shit. I was…you know and we’d…and I was…”

“Yes, you were dressed like a girl and we fucked. And you were the best fuck of my life and the sexiest guy ever. “

Eren shielded his face, glowering at the raven who easily announced the information. “Jez, can you be quiet?”

Levi leaned in his seat, one arm behind the head rest. “Are you embarrassed we fucked…? Do you…regret it?” Then Eren looked at Levi, finally, noticing the way his voice softened and his disposition shifted. His eyes were downcast, tracing the patterns on the table.

Levi was vulnerable. “I- No,no. I thought you wouldn’t want to see me…cause we fucked and you said you wanted to fuck me. And I thought I was a one night stand”

“Are you serious?” Levi barked. “I confessed my feelings to you. You are more than a fuck.”

The brunet stared at him uncertainly. “You were telling the truth…?”

“No shit, you asshat. I’d never do what I did with you. If I fuck someone, I only care about me getting off. But with you, I wanted you to feel good….cause you’re different.” Levi groaned and averted his eyes to the other side of the coffee shop; his cheeks were dusted with a tinge of pink.

Eren didn’t realize he was beaming till Levi jerked back in his seat. “God! Give me a warning. You have the creepiest smile right now. Like you’re about to skull fuck me.”

“You really like me?” Eren asked, voice raising an octave as he giggled girlishly.

Levi still wore a wary look, body poised far away from Eren. “Well not right now.”

“Asshole,” he snarled, frowning into his cup.

“Can you just be my boyfriend for fuck sakes?”

Eren coughed as the coffee traveled down the wrong hole, he beat his chest with a fist as he fought for air. “You fucking dipshit,” Levi rounded the table, patting his back, forcing air into his lunges. Eren gasped a gallon full of oxygen before he smiled sheepishly at Levi who had left to get him a cup of water. His throat throbbed and burned but the sensation was overwhelmed with elation at Levi’s proposal.

“Boyfriend?” Eren croaked belatedly and Levi dipped his eyes away.

“You know…if you want to…” Levi mumbled to the floor, fingers twiddling the end of his scarf. “You don’t have to if you’re not interested. I get it. I’ll-“The raven didn’t get a second to finish his statement, Eren cradled the back of his head and shoved his tongue down his mouth. Levi struggled for a moment at the sudden action before closing his eyes and groaning into the kiss. He was content to kiss Levi into a oblivion till a voice broken them apart.

“Fucking called it!”

“Guess I owe you 20, Armin,” Erwin stood at the opening with his arms around the shoulders of Eren’s blonde.

**Author's Note:**

> Man, this wasn't supposed to be so long. Like 5 pages max then things happened (this lil monster is 21 pages, holy shit). There's gonna be some errors, I looked over this a few times but I also miss a few. And I finally wrote gay sex! finally, right, I always chicken out of it when I write but now my cherry's popped and I got more smut planned.


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